Tuesday, August 4, 2009

New Beginnings

Today is my first blog. I type that as if I am typing "today is the first day of the rest of my life". But it feels momentous. I have been holding off writing any posts on this blog hoping something inspirational would come to me, something worth reading. Something that I wouldn't have to feel embarrassed about putting out there into the world. And then it hit me...this is a safe place for me. This place, if any place in the world (or virtual world), is somewhere I can be myself. My blog doesn't have to be perfect. Or awe-inspiring. It doesn't have to change the world. It just has to mean something. To me.

Today is fitting for the fact that I am making changes in my life. I am tired of that insistent little voice in the back of my head that constantly wonders what others think. If I'm good enough. If the words I write, the choices I make, or the things I say are being judged by those around me. So I ventured out today to find things that I love....just because. Things that I think are pretty for no reason other than their prettiness. I wondered around Old Town Glendale today and just enjoyed my time. If I looked down the block far enough off in the distance I could almost deceive myself into thinking I was in Flagstaff or Prescott. Close enough to get by. My first stop was a vintage clothing shop filled to the brim with antiques and pictures and hats and clothing. I found sliky black slips edged in delicate lace. I touched handkerchiefs that were so soft they were almost see through, embroidered at the edges with blues and pinks and yellows. I browsed black tight leather gloves that stretched half way up my forearm. I don't remember the last time I went somewhere like that and was delighted. I ended up buying two soft handkercheifs, because I feel like every woman should have one just because she thinks its pretty and soft to touch. The other thing I bought was some black mid arm gloves for the coming winter. They are so not me but I saw a girl wearing some once and thought they looked very classy and have always wanted some of my own. So there I go...not much to start but enough to know I have begun.

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